Thursday, March 12, 2009

Dear Past & Present,

I used to blog a lot. I think I've fallen off the wagon. I used to be literate and have mindful things to say, and I think I've fallen off that wagon. I read and I think, often, but the words I choose just don't sound right, to me, when I write. So, I stopped. Or I just stop. What happened to my writing? 
No, Mother, I do not want to take a writing class, I dislike writing about any given subject, or I love it. It's a love/hate relationship. Okay, Mother, I'll just start researching subject I enjoy and write a bit about them.
When I was a freshman in High School, we had impromtue writing assignments every morning. At first, I did not dig it, at all. We had to write about a quote the teacher wrote on the chalk board; It was usually a quote from an old philosopher such as Aristotle or someone of the likes.
I did not share until my teacher made me. For some stupid reason, she saw some stupid light shining down onto my big brown crown and thought my stupid mouth had something to share about the subject. So, I nervously read whatever comments I had written down about whatever quote she had written, and that was that. It was instant twinkle in her eye and she decided my insight was so superior I had to share, everyday.
Yes, this built up my confidence, but I still did not think my writing was special, by far not superior. 
And I still do not.
I am going to find the little journal she made us keep and look up some of the quotes she had us write down and my opinion on these quotes. For today, I'll leave this, my opinion of the weather.

It beautiful outside, sun shining on every little green shred of grass in the park. Flowers popping up and blossoming on tree's up and down all of these streets. The wide was strong. A force to be reckoned with. As I peddled my bike up N.E. Broadway from N. Vancouver, I thought I might as well try to reckon with this gusty mass. So I peddled all my might into it, steading forward, I thought so well, what a clear ride on such a beautiful day. One more gust came to my face, sweeping scattered pebbles, dirt and pollen from freshly cut grass into my unprotected eyes. Next time, I thought, I should bring sun glasses with me. But even if I had brought sun glasses, my head would be aching from squinching up my nose to keep the electric blue shades from falling off my sun dampened face. 
Thank you sun for keeping it bright this season. Thank you wind for keeping me cool on bike rides with too much baggage. Fuck you sun for shining so bright, my forehead hurts from squinting when I get home. Fuck you wind, for gusting all sorts of shabby earth into my eyes, nose and mouth.
I'm just trying to ride home, eco-friendly.
Fuck you brain for not writing what I think.

No comments: